Tag: team culture

Coxing High School Q&A Rowing Teammates & Coaches

Question of the Day

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So there is one girl on our team who is tinier than the rest of the team and she doesn’t pull as hard. She is pretty committed and went to all of our winter practices and meetings but her scores are a lot lower than other members. I have heard a few of the other rowers saying, “Why doesn’t she just quit?” And I’m the coxswain so it is my job to keep morale up. I just don’t know what to do in this situation. I tried talking to the other girls but nothing has changed.

Ah, been there. I watched a similar situation go down my sophomore year. We had a girl join our team who was enthusiastic, tried hard, was well liked by everyone, etc. but she had trouble keeping up with the other girls on the ergs because she was pretty small. Her technique was good and I think that helped make up for some of the strength deficits but most people only ever looked at her erg times, which weren’t good.

I was sitting with my friend who was the senior coxswain after practice one day and we overheard some of the varsity girls say the same thing – “Why doesn’t she just quit?” and my friend stepped in and said “Let me ask you a question. Would you rather have a teammate who tries but might not be as strong as you or a teammate who goes around talking about other people behind their back?”.

That ended up causing a huge argument which our coach ended up dealing with by basically telling the girls that they can either be supportive of their teammate who shows up (on time, everyday), gives 100% whenever she’s asked, is excited to be here, and does fine on the water or they can quit, because we don’t want or need rowers (let alone varsity rowers) who are willing to take whatever opportunity they find to talk down about another rower. If they don’t think she’s rowing like they think she should be, why aren’t they helping her? Why aren’t they giving her advice, sitting on the erg with her, etc.?

I would pose those questions to your teammates. I’d rather have a smaller rower who I know I can throw in the bow of nearly any boat than have a rower who thinks it’s OK to talk like that about a teammate.

College Coxing Q&A Teammates & Coaches

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How did you balance crew, classwork, and a social life while you were in college?

I didn’t at all. My college experience could be equated to Murphy’s Law – everything that could go wrong went wrong. Looking back I should have advocated for myself a lot more than I did when I talked to my coaches, I should have gone to my professors sooner when I realized I was falling behind, and I should have avoided my advisers entirely since they ended up steering me in the wrong direction more often than not. The way things panned out with rowing and college in general is without question the biggest regret I have.

College itself wasn’t a shock to my system or anything so there really wasn’t an adjustment period there but as soon as classes started I got smacked in the face with crew from every angle. Practice twice a day, weights in the morning twice a week after a row (7-8:30am before classes), not to mention having a teammate as a roommate (alarm clock going off every five minutes for an hour starting at 4:30am … I wanted to kill her) was a lot to deal with on top of the usual college stuff.

I started taking classes over the summer and already had an incredible group of friends before the year even started. I went from seeing them every day to never seeing them. I was way too exhausted to go out on the weekends so I missed a lot of opportunities to hang out and stuff. I justified missing out by saying that rowing in college was what I wanted to do and I knew there were going to be sacrifices and if this was one of them, fine. All work and no play is not healthy.

Classes were a whole separate issue entirely. I was excited about my major and most of my classes but it’s hard to maintain that excitement when you’re late to your morning class every day because you get held over by 20, 30, 40 minutes at practice (and then have to wait for the shuttle back to campus) and are so exhausted at the end of the day that you can’t manage any brain waves when it’s time to actually do your work. I’d come back from afternoon/evening practice around 6-7pm, maybe grab something to eat (justified again by not having enough time, I didn’t feel that hungry anyways, etc.), take a quick break to wind down from the day (usually in the form of a shower, which was the only time during the day when I felt no pressure to do anything), and then start my homework. That’d go from 8pm-2am usually before I’d set my alarm and go to bed. If I got more than 3 hours of sleep a night I was ecstatic. I was constantly running on empty.

I’ve always been a good student but my grades were awful and having never experienced that before, I was constantly kicking my own ass and telling myself to get it together. I was nervous to talk to my professors because I figured they would look at me as an entitled athlete expecting special treatment so I didn’t go to them for help (until it was all but too late) and instead committed myself to figuring out how to fix things on my own. Needless to say, that didn’t work.

Midway through the semester, I hated crew. Like, absolutely hated it. I didn’t feel like I was getting any opportunities to do anything useful when I was at practice and I (and some of the other coxswains) always felt like the coaches were pretty “meh” towards everyone but their “favorite” coxswain. Whenever the subject of crew, the team, etc. would get brought up by friends, family, professors, etc. I could feel the look of disgust on my face. If I never saw another oar, boat, or cox box ever again it would have been too soon. It went from being something that I loved doing more than anything to a job that I despised waking up for. I was stressed beyond belief, I was constantly getting sick (I ended missing nine straight days of classes at one point because I was so run down … the doctors I saw were horrified and almost made me check into the hospital for treatment), I had no energy, and the energy that I did have was spent convincing myself that this was what I wanted. I wanted this!

When I had conversations with my coaches or athletic advisers, I got nowhere. My athletic advisers, instead of finding ways to help me, only offered the suggestion of “just pick an easier major”, which I ignored because that’s literally the most lazy, bullshit piece of advice ever. My coaches guilt tripped me because I had committed myself to the team and I had to fulfill that, blah blah blah. I sat in their offices ready to punch the walls at a moment’s notice because it was like … do you think I don’t know that I made a commitment? Why do you think I’m running myself into the ground right now? I’m doing it because of this commitment!

Eventually it came to the point where I knew I had to walk away. My grades were the number one reason but my health (physical and mental) was another. I had never felt before what I felt my freshman year. I was in a perpetual state of fatigue, hunger, anger, stress, anxiety, depression, etc. that no one understood. The people I did talk to about what was going on knew maybe 1% of everything – the rest of it I kept to myself. People aren’t joking when they say doing that eats away at you. I could feel myself becoming less and less of the person I was before and that only added to everything I was feeling.

Walking away from crew was the hardest decision I’ve ever had to make. I know it doesn’t seem like something that a normal person would agonize over but for me it was. I knew that quitting (something I had never done before) would put an end to my dreams of competing at the elite level. I was back home when I got a call from the assistant coach who said that she could tell something had been going on. No shit, really? Do you think maybe you should have said something beforehand instead of rubbing my “commitment” in my face? I told her I needed some time to figure out what I wanted but I didn’t think I was going to be on the team next season. It wasn’t until I took a step back and realized how miserable I was making myself that I realized the choice was already made. I called my coach back and said I was done.

I hate that I’m that person who is the anomaly and couldn’t make things work out. There are thousands of collegiate rowers out there that do and on some level, I’m envious of that. I’ve realized in the years since that I should have stuck up for myself and I should have told my coaches at the very beginning that something wasn’t right. Whether they could or would have helped me is something I’ll never know but I should have made the effort to at least see what they had to say. Asking for help as a coxswain is something that’s really easy for me but asking for help in “real life” is really hard and it bit me in the ass here.

The simplest piece of advice I have is that the moment you start to feel the ground under you getting a little shaky, figure out why and then go talk to the appropriate people until you’ve got things stabilized. Even if you don’t think you need someone else’s help, down the line you will. If your professors know ahead of time that you’re juggling a lot and struggled a bit with a certain topic, problem set, etc., they can at least throw out a “Hey, how have you been doing since we last talked?” at the beginning or end of class one day. I never had any professors like this but maybe you do. They can’t help you if they don’t know there’s a problem though, regardless of how minor it is.

Related: How do you fight off the stress of rowing? I can’t just stop because it helps me ease school stuff but at the same time it makes everything pile up and I can’t hold everything in anymore.

Don’t ever let anyone tell you to “just switch to an easier major”. In the short term that might solve the problem but in the long run you probably aren’t going to be happy. Also, don’t let your coaches guilt trip you, make school seem like an interference to crew, or make you feel like your concerns are invalid. Don’t let anyone else invalidate your concerns either – family, friends, significant others, teammates, etc. How you balance crew, classes, and having a life is different for each individual too. There’s an experimentation period of trial and error where you find out what works for you before you settle into a routine, but the key is making sure your routine is dictated by you and not someone or something else.

Novice Q&A Racing Rowing Teammates & Coaches

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Question (especially for a novice boat): What defines a winning/champion boat and one that comes up short?

Attitude. There are a lot of things that define champions but attitude is the most important.

Related: Words.

You can still be a championship-caliber team if you’ve lost a race. It’s entirely based on how you react immediately after the race ends, how much time you spend reflecting on everything up to that point (training, practicing, and the race itself), and the commitment you make to yourself and your teammates to go back and worker harder. If you give in to defeat, you’ve already lost all your future races. People aren’t kidding when they say champions don’t quit, they never give up, etc. If you lose a race, especially one you knew you could have won or should have one, you’re allowed to be pissed off with yourself but wallowing in self-pity or taking your anger out on someone else (especially the other competitors or your teammates) is unacceptable. Be angry, but use that anger to motivate you the next time you get out on the water. It’s like the saying goes, let your past make you better, not bitter. Don’t let one bad race affect your attitude or the amount of effort you put into training. If anything, your attitude and the amount of effort you put forth should be better and higher than they were before.

Attitude also defines a winning boat. Championships mean nothing if your attitude doesn’t reflect humility and respect. Look at all the gold medalists from the Olympics last year. One of the common threads amongst all of them was that they didn’t just thank their families, coaches, and teammates … they thanked their competitors too. You have to respect your competition enough to bring it 100% every time you go out to race. Following the rules, stuff like that, that’s obvious but going out and racing to your fullest potential while pushing and being pushed by the competition is one of the biggest signs of respect in sports, at least in my opinion.

Related: Words.

You also have to be humble. If you win a big race, like Eastern Sprints in a close race (like say, Brown and Harvard), cheering and whooping it up is always expected but there is a line when it comes to celebrating. Cross it and the quality of your win starts being overshadowed by the way you’re acting. I guarantee you in that race, Brown left the water with a hell of a lot more respect for Harvard than they had going in. If those two crews hadn’t been rowing off each other during the race, it wouldn’t have ended like it did. They were each other’s motivation, they were pushing each other, they were fueling each other and you can’t not have respect for a crew that does that for you.

Champions know that they won’t be champions for long unless they show up for practice every day. They know that they aren’t training to beat their competitors on their best day, they’re training to beat them on their worst. They know that taking one stroke off is a sign of disrespect and that quitting shouldn’t even be in their vocabulary. The team leaders (coxswains, captains, upperclassmen, coaches, etc.) also know that know that attitude reflects leadership.

Q&A Teammates & Coaches

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As a coach, how do you approach the quiet ones? You know, those kids who always just kinda smile and nod? I can figure out almost all my rowers personalities but I don’t know how to make the one open up. She’s a hard worker and listens, I just feel like she tenses up around me. Perhaps I frighten her? Or is she maybe just a quiet kid?

I’ve coached and coxed a few people like that. One of my “things” as a coach is that I try to not act any differently around the kids than I do with anyone else. I feel like some coaches put on a front when they get to practice and act as though they have to make it known that they’re in charge, which tends to put a lot of people off, especially the shy ones. I don’t change how I act or my personality or anything like that – in my experience when coaches or professors have done that, it makes them way less approachable, so I just try to avoid doing that. I have a really dry, sarcastic sense of humor too so I tend to make a lot of jokes and stuff when we’re on the water that ultimately ends up loosening everyone up pretty quickly – even the quiet ones.

Over the summer when I was coaching new people every two weeks, I’d try and spend some time the first day getting to know everyone and assessing their personalities. I knew almost immediately who the tough ones to crack were going to be so when we’d do stuff on the erg or when we’d get out in the boat, I’d ask them questions or point out something they were doing well and get really enthusiastic about it if they answered or demonstrated whatever we were doing correctly. Not like, fake enthusiastic, but genuinely excited. Sometimes hearing or seeing that they’re doing something right was all they’d need to break out of their shell.

On the other hand though, maybe being quiet and shy is just an inherent part of their personality, which means it’s something you’ve just gotta roll with. If they’re quiet and reserved to the point where it concerns you, I’d pull them off to the side after practice and ask them if everything is OK. I had to do this once over the summer and it was honestly so heartbreaking because the kid (almost to the point of tears) said that they didn’t want to be there, they wanted to be at a math or physics or … something like that … camp at MIT, but their parents said they had to play a sport so they’d been shuffling them to all sorts of sports camps all summer. The kid was absolutely miserable and there really was nothing I could do to make them enjoy being there so I just had to be as polite and upbeat as possible and accept the fact that this wasn’t something they were interested in. The only thing that really helped in that situation was if we were just standing around waiting to go out I’d ask them about what they were actually interested in. That got them talking and semi-happy, at least for a few minutes.

Another thing you could do if you know who her friends on the team are or if you see her parents regularly before/after practice is talk to them and ask if she’s normally this quiet. Getting some insight from people who know her well can help you get to know her better and figure out the best way to interact with her. That helped me over the summer – normally it’d be the parents approaching the coaches instead of the other way around, but either way it helped us a lot in getting to know the kids. The biggest thing is that you treat her like you do everyone else – don’t pay less attention to her just because she’s less outgoing than her teammates. Eventually/hopefully if she sees you’re making an effort to get to know her, she’ll open up.

College Coxing Q&A Teammates & Coaches

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Hey. I’m just beginning as a coxswain on the men’s team at a D3 college and had a question about the relationship between the captain and the coxswain. They’re both supposed to be leading the team, so where do their jobs differ? I understand that in the boat, of course, the coxswain is in charge but I was wondering more how you handle your relationship with the captain leadership-wise during practices, on land, for team affairs, other leadership functions aside from specifically coxing the boat, etc. How much captain control is too much? I’ve heard that coxswains are supposed to run practices when the coach isn’t around and during the offseason but my captain has been doing that. I realize I’m new so it makes sense, but if I weren’t, theoretically, is that atypical? Thanks for all of posting all of these things. It’s been really helpful.

This is a great question and not one that coaches think about too much when they appoint captains. There is HUGE potential for butting heads if the responsibilities and expectations of both the coxswain and captain aren’t clearly laid out ahead of time.

From my perspective, here’s a brief synopsis of what I think the roles of each are:

Coxswains

The role of the coxswain, like you said, is to lead their boat while they’re on the water and when mandated during on-land practices. In the boat, the only person with any authority is the coxswain (not counting the coach, obviously). It’s as simple as that. While the team is erging, they’ll take down times, cox the rowers if necessary, and observe. Sometimes the coach will also ask them to lead a body circuit or calisthenics or something. When it comes to actual rowing stuff, coxswains are by default the go-to person. It’s also their responsibility to set a good example for the rest of the team – showing up on time (don’t ever be late, EVER), making sure everything is clean and put away at the end of practice, having a good attitude (regardless of the current state of your team, practice, etc.), etc.

Captains

Not every team has captains, so on teams where there aren’t any, coxswains sometimes absorb those duties in addition to their own. When a team does have captains, I look at them as holding more of an “administrative” (yet still very important) role. There’s probably a better word for it but I’m drawing a blank if there is. A captain’s role is to be a leader when it comes to general team management – at team and/or parent meetings, the captains usually go to act as a voice for the entire team. That’s their biggest role, in my opinion. Sometimes they’ll also be in charge of things like finding fundraising opportunities, making sure everyone has their pre-season paperwork turned in, etc. It’s also their responsibility to maintain communication with the coach and pass along any information from him/her to the team, most commonly something like a change in practice time, date, or location.

During the winter months, usually in between finals before Christmas break and the time before winter training starts when you get back to campus, captains can also be in charge of holding practices for those wishing to workout. These are usually optional practices since everyone’s schedule is all over the place in December-January. They’re informal and most likely involve a text or Facebook message saying something along the lines of “The captains are heading to the gym at 1:30pm today for a quick lifting session if anyone wants to join!” In this case, they are in charge of practice since the coaches and coxswains aren’t present. Coxswains can still go but they’ll take a backseat in terms of who leads things. In addition to all of that, like the coxswains, they must also set a good example for the rest of the team. Their desire to always improve, commitment to their teammates, and enthusiasm for the sport and their team should never be questioned.

In terms of how much control is too much, I would say that if one person starts infringing on the responsibilities of another, that’s too much. If a captain starts trying to tell the coxswain what to do in the boat or the coxswain starts trying to take over as “voice of the team”, that is when a power struggle tends to happens. This is why if your team has captains, it’s imperative that either you two sit down and figure out who’s going to do what or your coach lays out a specific set of guidelines before captains are voted on stating exactly what their responsibilities are. Maintaining a good relationship between captains and coxswains will make practice a LOT better for everyone involved. If they’re constantly trying to one-up the other, they’re going to lose a lot of respect really fast from their teammates.

Related: I know coaches are always looking for “team leaders” but there’s this one girl on my team who TRIES to be a leader but is just ignorant & bossy. Inevitably, she only hurts herself by getting on her teammates & even coaches nerves. She’s leaving next year (along with a huge majority of my team) & I want to be an effective leader but I’m afraid of being annoying to underclassmen like this girl is to me. How do I lead w/o being bossy and making people want to straight up slap me in the face?

As a novice coxswain, I would look to both the varsity coxswains and your captain(s) as you learn how things are done on your team. It might seem like your captain is being pushy right now but it’s likely that they’re just trying to help ease you into things or the coach has given them the specific job of running off-season workouts. Either way, I wouldn’t worry too much about it right now. Talk with them and ask what their role on the team usually is and what can you expect for yours to be. Getting that clarified right away, as if I haven’t said it enough already, will make things much easier for both of you.

Related: As a coxswain, I guess you could say this is my first actual leadership position. I’ve had a little experience with being in charge of activities, but never the safety of a 30 thousand dollar boat … or people. What would you say makes an effective leader? Most people if they are, are born leaders. How would you bring that out of someone, if that’s even possible?

PS: If you’re a coxswain and a captain, make sure you keep your ego in check. The “Napoleon complex” thing is meant as a joke when it comes to coxswains so let’s not ruin it by becoming tyrannical, power hungry gremlins.

College Q&A Teammates & Coaches

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I’m not sure if it’s like this at other colleges but our varsity and novice teams are separated. Winter and Spring season is supposed to mix novice and varsity, but our novice group feels as if the varsity is “stuck up”, as if they don’t remember their novice year [at some point in their life]. There are a few that are super nice and helpful but the others scorn or just don’t talk to us. Do you have any advice on handling it? Or are we too sensitive – maybe we’ll bond later on?

I think many of us felt this way when we were freshmen too – Syracuse was similar in how they separated the novice and varsity teams. Normally the winter training trip is used as a big bonding sesh between the varsity and novices so you’ve got that to look forward to. In time, I think everyone gets to know each other better by default but it does take some effort on both parts. Try to plan some events together, whether it be dinner at someone’s apartment, a party with the other teams, etc. and see if that helps.

From the novice’s perspective, I’d start the season with a clean slate and just try talking with them. It doesn’t have to be a huge gab-fest or anything, just something like “hey, how’d your row go” or “did you have professor _____ when you were a freshman?” or just something super casual like that. It’s simple stuff but it initiates interaction between you two. If they still act bitchy and don’t talk to you … honestly, I’d just say “their loss” and stick with the ones who are nice to you and who you enjoy being around. I don’t think you’re being overly sensitive – situations like this can be frustrating for everyone, but more so when you constantly have to be around the same people.

How to Survive Winter Training: Solidarity

College Ergs High School Teammates & Coaches Training & Nutrition

How to Survive Winter Training: Solidarity

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Previously: Rowers || Coxswains || Music + TV || The light at the end of the tunnel

Winter training undeniably has its downsides, especially for those of us in the Northeast or Midwest where the cold, snow, ice, etc. can keep us inside for 4-5 months but it’s … comforting, I guess? … to know that we’re not the only ones.

Some of us might experience better weather or milder winters than others but regardless, something to keep in mind is that no one is doing anything different than you are right now. We’re all doing the same erg workouts, we’re all spending time in in the weight room, we’re all biding our time until we can escape to warm weather for a week … bottom line is we’re all putting in the work. The only difference is the quality of that work.

Below are some winter training videos from various crews that show how they spend the winter months. If you’re starting to feel burned out, watch these for some motivation and remember that we’re all in the same boat (…pun maybe intended?).

 Image via // @washingtonrowing

College Novice Q&A Teammates & Coaches

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I guess this is more a social life outside of rowing kind of question, but I’m in university rowing and there are a lot of socials which a lot of people attend. But, being in the UK, it’s all about getting drunk and partying etc, and I don’t particularly enjoy that so most of the time I feel left out and only go to the bigger ones (like Christmas ball) and have one glass. But I’m also a novice and want to meet people/seniors which is hard if you just go to practice. Do you have any advice?

When you go to the socials, try not to focus so much on the fact that you feel left out – instead, try and join in on some conversations if you see any happening, as well as look for anyone else who looks equally bored. There’s almost always someone else who is uncomfortable or feeling left out too that you can strike a conversation with.

If parties aren’t your thing, that’s OK! Take the initiative to try and organize something more low-key – maybe a team dinner at one of the senior’s apartments at the start of the year/season to get to know the new team members or a team activity to raise money for charity (an ergathon, triathlon, etc.). You’d be surprised how well you can get to know someone when you have to be on an organizing committee with them. You could also have once-a-month team get togethers … ideas for that could be each boat brings their favorite board/card game to play and you spend the night playing games, going on a restaurant crawl (drinks at one restaurant, appetizers at another, entree at another, desserts at another), etc. You could also look on Groupon or similar deal-sites to see if they have any good deals on stuff like rock climbing, laser tag, spa days & massages, etc. that you and some teammates can do.

Don’t be afraid to admit that parties aren’t your thing. If there is an upperclassman that you know fairly well, ask them for their advice … just say that parties aren’t your thing but you don’t want to seem anti-social or like you don’t want to get to know people, because you do. They might have some ideas for you too!

Q&A Training & Nutrition

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What’s your opinion on rowers smoking/drinking? Do you think there can ever be a balance or should athletes just avoid it?

Well, smoking for one is a straight no because lung function is kind of important to rower and smoking, obviously, hinders that. I also feel like drinking is fairly self-explanatory too. When you’re training and in-season, there’s really no place for it. If you’re just having like, a beer then whatever but if you’re pounding Jagerbombs knowing that you have practice the following morning then maybe take a step back and reevaluate your priorities.

Many teams implement a “dry policy” when they’re in season too that everyone’s expected to adhere to. You also have to consider how your behavior is going to effect yourself, your boat, and your team if you’re drinking or partying too much. That’s an important one to consider because with any other sport, you can put the second-string player in and it wouldn’t effect much. With rowing, adding in a new person to the boat that you’re not used to rowing with or being coxed by can unintentionally mess everything up.

Common sense isn’t all that common but it really reigns supreme here. Situations like this are all about exercising good judgement and just using your common sense.

Coxing Q&A Teammates & Coaches

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Advice from a coxes perspective would be great. I’ve been lucky enough to have the same cox for 2 years & he used to be amazing. Recently, it’s felt very much like he’s lost interest. He’s just in the boat, not part of the crew. He’s going through the motions. It makes it very hard to stay motivated, given everything else that’s crappy. He’s also coxing the elite men, maybe he sees them as his chance to win & we’re just the disorganized cranky old women he coxes sometimes. Should I call him on the change?

Ah, I know this feeling. Sometimes I recognize it right away and other times I don’t realize it until after the fact. It’s possible that you’re right – he identifies more strongly with the men and recognizes their competitiveness as a chance to really exercise his coxing muscles so that’s where he’s shifted his focus. I get that because I’ve been in similar situations.. If your crew really is the “disorganized cranky old women he coxes sometimes” then that’s most likely what’s going on. Guys coxing women is tough to begin with but the one consistency I’ve noticed with the few guys I’ve discussed it with is that when the rowers start typical “girl” drama, they get disinterested pretty fast.

I completely understand why it’s hard to stay motivated when your coxswain makes it obvious, either intentionally or unintentionally, that they don’t want to be there. As a crew, I think it’s well within your right to sit down and talk with him. I would hope you’d do the same for any rower displaying the same attitude. Ask him if he’s free for a boat meeting one day (ideally after practice or on a day when you’re not going on the water) and then make a short list of what you want to talk about. I find that boat meetings are much more effective when there’s a set agenda. Explain to him that you’ve noticed over the last few weeks/months that something has changed and he doesn’t seem as into the boat as he used to be. Avoid directly accusing him of liking the elite men better since you don’t actually know that’s the issue. First ask him if everything is ok – maybe school or work has been really hectic lately and he’s just been low on energy. Everybody’s been there so hopefully the crew can understand this. If he says everything is fine, then you can broach the subject of the elite men.

Explain that you’ve noticed that since he started coxing the elite men, he seems less interested in coxing your boat. Again, don’t be accusatory – state what you’ve seen and let him explain from there. Tell him that if that’s the case then it might be best for him to take some time and decide if he wants to continue coxing you guys. Explain that you’re happy that he’s coxing a crew that has such high potential but your focus is your boat and you need a coxswain who is just as invested in this crew as the rowers are. If he says he’s become disinterested or less motivated, ask him why. Be prepared that he might say it’s because of the crew, for whatever reason. Don’t be offended or defensive – take what he’s saying as an opportunity to improve and make some changes.

For me, I tend to lose interest really fast when I’m working with people who aren’t as invested, motivated, or “into” whatever it is we’re doing. If I can see that I’m putting in all this effort but they aren’t, why should I continue doing what I’m doing if I’m the only one doing it? Having coached a couple teams at the same time over the last few months, I’ve also noticed that when one team is at a 3 and another team is at an 8, my excitement, enthusiasm, and effort is naturally going to go to the team at an 8. I tend to notice this after the fact but now that it’s something I know, it’s helped me prepare for future coaching situations.

Like I said, I wouldn’t just look at him being a flake … look at the team and see if the attitudes of the rowers or the crew as a whole could have played a factor in his declining levels of interest. Coxswains need to feel motivated and inspired too so when it doesn’t feel like the rowers are giving 100% coxswains can interpret their role on the team as being pointless, which makes it really hard to get into practice.