I’ve just been dropped from my coach’s 1st boat after 18 months of loyalty & hard work. He did it by email (coward!) so I haven’t spoken to him yet. Is it OK not to want to? Would you expect your rowers to come to you & ask why? I was so angry at first, but I feel like I’ve found peace with it now & in that peace I’ve sort of concluded for various complex reasons that I don’t want the 8+ back, I’d rather move into smaller boats & try to move on that way. Do you think it’s OK to admit that to him?
Hmm. I think it’s OK to not want to talk to him but I still think you should, if only to get clarification and insight since he’s the one who made the final decision. Once you know and understand his reasoning then you can bring up the subject of maybe moving to smaller boats, provided your reasoning is legit and not just because you’re pissed you got taken out of the eight. As long as you aren’t rude, immature, bitter, etc. towards him or the other rowers, I think you’ll be fine. That’s where problems arise when people get taken out of boats, they develop bad attitudes that essentially start to poison the rest of the team, which obviously has a lot of negative consequences.
Be mature about it and say that you accept his decision but after 18 months you feel as though you deserve at least a little background information as to how he came to the decision to move you down. Ask what you can improve on and regardless of whether or not you agree with what he says, make an effort to work on those things. Just because you got dropped down now doesn’t mean you’re going to stay out of the first boat forever. Don’t burn that bridge just yet.